Nowadays, no one seems to give importance to having a more interesting, meaningful conversation and enjoy talking about superficial or fluffy topics. People’s approach towards socializing stresses more on having a conversation in terms of quantity not quality. It might not be possible for many of the people to understand what actually a deep or substantial conversation is. It is because people’s attention span has been hacked to pieces by endless digital spins which has made deep conversation the primary casualty of our wanting patience.
In a way, it’s good news for people who want to stand out from the crowd. With a bit of tact and awareness, you can make your conversational skills like a transformational tool that leaves others reeling for days. Following are the ways you can learn to make your conversational skills from dead fish to superstar in no time.
Find something the other person is excited about:
According to experts, the best way to make a deep conversation is to give it a good start. You can ask the other person what they are interested in and show that you want to learn more about the topic. Ask serious questions about the topic even if it isn’t that serious.
Find out about their qualities:
Never start your conversation with the phrase “what do you do?” because it will restrict you and the other person to just talk about things relating to your work. Ask them about what they are most good at, ask about how they like to enjoy and where they would prefer to go on a vacation.
Do not discuss weather:
Discussing weather is like the black hole of shallow conversation. It is like a plague that can ruin your entire time of a conversation. Therefore, avoid discussing about the weather at all costs.
Assume others to have deep thoughts:
If you start a conversation thinking the other person as dull and unintelligent, you will never be able to go into a deep talk. Maybe you have never talked to them about things they are interested in and have tons of information to share with you. Consider them as deep thinkers and ask meaningful questions.
Do not persuade them:
When you indulge in a conversation, listen to other people’s opinions with patience. Respect their values and beliefs and do not push them to adopt your point of view. Be open to hearing their opinions and try to understand their perspective.
Ask about experiences:
Do no ask other people to give direct answers to your questions. Ask them about their experiences. Allow them to tell you a story and it will help you learn more about the other persona and their perspective.
Asking for advice:
To end the conversation in a meaningful way, ask people about their advice. It is not necessary that you actually act on that advice but it surely will bring a jolt of mindfulness to the conversation.
The article originally appeared on Business insider