On an average, we have 456 emotions a day. Have we ever wondered what do we do with all these emotions?
Some of us don’t even pay attention to our emotions. We are given 6 seconds to catch the triggers that are building in our reactive and social brains before we make a choice. But we remain unable to understand our emotions and go against our own will!
In our brains we have a “fight or flight” mode and most of us find refuge in fleeing a situation. But there are some people who chose the “fight” mode for their every emotion. These are the people whose emotions are not overwhelmed by thinking and actions. They have the ability to understand their own emotions as well as accurately read others emotions.
These are the people who become successful in their life. They have a command over personal as well as social competence. They have the power to focus on
- Social awareness,
- Relationship management.
These are the people who possess Emotional Intelligence!
According to psychology today,
“Emotional Intelligence is the ability to identify and manage your own emotions and the emotion of others”.
These are the people who have the ability to deliver quality performance; value the priorities of others and then align those needs to create a more productive culture. The emotional intelligence allows them to better connect with others, make better decisions, and skillfully cope with stress.
Emotional intelligence is a skill that is crucial for both leaders and employees. Unlike IQ, emotional intelligence is not hard to change. Everyone can change especially the ones who are seriously willing to try. For that you need to restrain from the following things which are a complete “No” in successful people’s lives.
They do not poke their nose in other people’s affairs:
Emotionally intelligent people are not ever curios about other people; they do not ask questions that are pointless. They do not make assumptions on their own. They never like to become a source of a person’s anger but always provide help when someone is in need. Give people good advice in a gentle and a loving manner. They are good listeners and offer assistance when required.
They avoid drama in life:
They do not get caught up in conflicts with friends, family or at workplace. They tend to avoid people who pass their time gossiping about others. Gossip for them is an energy drainer so they avoid all such things and conserve their energy for more productive purposes.
They do not feel victimized:
Emotionally intelligent people do not whine for what they didn’t achieve in life. Instead they find new avenues of possibilities. They believe on exploiting the resources around them rather than waiting for the miracles to happen. With their hard work and persistence, they make miracles happen. They don’t dwell on problems because they know they are most efficient when they focus on solutions.
They do not say “yes” until they really want to:
Emotionally intelligent people are aware of the power of the word “No” and they are not afraid to wield it. Saying “yes” to everyone and everything increases stress, burnout, and even depression. They rely on their will power to focus on their goals and personal well-being.
They do not allow others to limit their joy:
Emotionally intelligent people are well aware of the fact that happiness in life comes from achieving peace of mind and contentment. Therefore they are always in a search for opportunities that delight them in their life. They find hobbies that help them enjoy their free time. They have control over their emotions which makes them self-sufficient in all manners of life.
They don’t believe in self-pity:
These people never do the negative self-talk. They do not allow the negative thoughts to enter in their brain. They encourage themselves for what they have achieved. They shun those voices inside their head that tells them they didn’t achieve much. They believe in their abilities and try to make their every performance in life as the first and last.
They do not cry over spilt milk:
“The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually fear you will make one”. Elbert Hubbard
Emotionally intelligent people do not grieve for their mistakes in the past rather they learn from those mistake. Dwelling on previous mistakes only make you feel depressed and helpless which restrains from moving forward in life. So emotionally intelligent people take their mind off from failures and focus on their future prospects. Because they know one day when they will be successful in life and will look back, they will laugh on these situations. Mistakes encourage them to hit the future opportunities with more diligence and hard work.